I guess right now, I could make a post about how and when I became aware that my perfectly beautiful, perfectly perfect twin boys were somehow different. I can pinpoint the time, although there is much dispute on whether or not this can be done. In my experience and mother expertise, I know it can be done.
The fact is, that does not really matter at this point. What happened, it just happened. The journey of it has brought us pretty far from that hopeless place of undiagnosed, under diagnosed, and flat out ignored.
These things are changing. Awareness is changing. Education and community are changing. Acceptance is pretty much here. The word stirs a bit of discomfort in me, accepting what I always wish I could change.
The ignorance of people is changing. There are still those who ask me if I believe anything I did caused this. I am not sure what purpose those questions serve, but they cut deeply.
There are still the ones who think if I would have spanked my kids, this would not have gotten so out of hand. When you have a child on that edge and everything you do has a great deal to do with whether or not they spend a day rocking back and forth humming and twirling things in their hands or actually making a momentary effort to touch you or make eye contact, I guarantee you compassion would take precedence.
Autism is no curse. There are so many steps forward in our society, yet we still have no defined cause or cure. We have questions. We need answers. Our loved ones deserve that.
That is the end of my rant.
Here are my babies.
When they were babies.